Wedding Invitation Etiquette
When should we mail save the dates? Do we need them?
Save the dates help set the tone for your wedding and let guests know to pencil you in. They should be mailed 6-12 months before your wedding date, and they can match your invitation in design and/or formality, or be completely different. They are especially helpful for out-of-town guests and for destination weddings.
When should we mail our wedding invitations?
Wedding invitations should be in the mail 6-8 weeks before your wedding date, unless you're having a destination wedding. Destination wedding invitations should be mailed 3 months before your wedding date.
What should our RSVP date be?
We typically see RSVP dates one month before the wedding date. This gives you time to communicate meal choices to your caterer, if necessary, and enough time follow up with guests who forget to send in their replies.
can we request online rsvps?
Online RSVPs can be a great option for more casual weddings (see the "mini cards" in our shop for sharing your website address), but mail is better for traditional or more formal weddings. And although the data from online RSVPs can be sent straight to a spreadsheet for easy accounting, it's kinda fun to get all those RSVP cards in the mail. If you are requesting online RSVPs, consider including a phone number for less tech-savvy guests.
How should we share our wedding website?
Your save the date is a great place to share your wedding website. If you choose to send website information with your invitations, you can list it on a small website card (called a "mini card" in our shop) or on a detail card.
How should we share our registry information?
Registry information is best kept on your wedding website or shared by word of mouth. Let your wedding party and close family know where to direct guests to find registry info.
How do we let guests know about the dress code?
Sharing a dress code is completely optional (if you want to do so, try "black tie," "casual attire," or "cocktail attire"). Your wedding invitations set the tone for your wedding, and should give guests an idea of how formal your event will be. This is also good information to share on your wedding website.
How do we avoid uninvited guests?
Be clear about who is invited to your wedding when you address your invitations by listing each guest by name. You can also include wording such as "we have reserved ___ seats in your honor" on the reply card. If guests reply for more than were invited, a polite phone call or email explaining that you are having an intimate wedding is perfectly acceptable.
Do we need inner envelopes?
Inner envelopes are slightly smaller than the larger outer envelope, and are not gummed (sticky). They are not required, but it can be argued that they make it very clear who is invited and who is not. If the inner envelope tradition is not important to you, we say save room in your budget for other things!
Do we have to include "plus ones" for single guests?
You should invite spouses and partners of those in serious relationships, but whether you include "and guest" on the envelopes for single friends and family is entirely up to you.
What's the deal with tissue paper in invitations?
Tissue paper was traditionally used to keep the ink from smearing, but today ink smearing is less of an issue. That said, if you will have heavy ink coverage on a card, or dark envelopes, it's not a bad idea to include tissue to protect the other cards.